Waiting in a Cave while the Universe unfolds (as it should)
by Alien From Afar
Summary: Spock Prime watches the campfire in Delta Vega's ice cave after Vulcan's destruction. And he thinks.


[The old man is watching a campfire inside an ice cave. Thinking, hearing the two halves of his being as detached entities in his head…

Just a vignette, about why Spock Prime was so unconcerned about revealing himself as coming from the future and giving freely mind melds, equations and advice in "Star Trek (2009)." He was way more reticent in "Star Trek into Darkness," although he still shared an important information. What made him consider doing that, and then reconsider it?

"Jim, I just lost my planet. I can tell you, I am emotionally compromised."

"Being split in two halves is no theory with me, Doctor. I have a Human half, you see, as well as an Alien half, submerged, constantly at war with each other. Personal experience, Doctor. I survive it because my intelligence wins over both, makes them live together."

And act together, I would say.]

* * *

 **Waiting in a cave while the universe unfolds (as it should).**

(The old man is watching a campfire inside an ice cave. Thinking, hearing the two halves of his being as detached entities in his head. Half **Human** , half _Vulcan_ he is.)

 **How long have I been here?**

 _It is difficult to determine a specific period of time. Every temporal parameter has been disrupted._

 **What day is today?**

 _It is nearly impossible to determine a specific date. It depends on what Nero said, and he could have made an estimation, be mistaken, or have lied to me._

 **Why did he leave me here with a torch and combustible? Why did he leave me here alone? Why didn't he come back to finish me? Where is he now?**

 _He knew I would act logically and lit a fire. He wanted to be certain I would survive long enough to witness his actions and suffer its consequences. As for the rest, there is not data as to determine his whereabouts._

 **I am sick of trying to determine things.**

 _Trying to determine things without actual data is illogical._

(The old man adds some combustible to the fire.)

 **What do I do now? Should I try to find the Federation Outpost? And if by sheer luck I arrive there, what do I tell them?**

 _It is unadvisable to try to contact anyone at this point. There is nothing to do, nothing left of Vulcan to save. Revealing myself in this time and place would worsen an already disastrous situation._

 **But he won't stop. Earth is next. Romulus, Vulcan, my mother's home, and more blood in my hands. I can't allow that to happen. Caution can go to Hell as far as I am concerned. I have to stop him.**

 _I am not reasoning logically. My emotions have overcome me._

 **Feeling like this is logical. It's the only logical way to be after what I witnessed today.**

 _I accomplish nothing by letting myself fall into despair._

 **I am already fully in despair. Isn't anything I can do?**

 _I have no way to establish communications, nor instruments to find out any useful data, nor weapons to defend myself or stop him. I cannot leave this cave._

 **I need help.**

 _There is no help._

(The fire crackles and reignites. It will last for some hours more.)

 **How did I came to this point?**

 _That is a rhetorical question._

 **I just wished to add to knowledge. I did it most of my lifetime.**

 _There is no scientific theory or law that bears my name. Anyone could have done what I did, the same or better._

 **I taught new generations of officers, tried my best to make them the best.**

 _I just did what many other nameless instructors have done. My mother was indeed a pioneer teacher. I will be remembered as Valeris's sponsor, the one who did not realize what she was doing until it was too late._

 **I wanted to help different species and peoples to live peacefully and prosper together.**

 _There is no peace treaty associated to my name. My father was a towering figure of diplomacy, I am not._

 **Is it logical to worry about my legacy at this point?**

 _My legacy is as it is. To worry is always illogical. Another of my many flaws._

 **Is there a meaning for all what has happened?**

 _I am a combination that should not have been. That is the logical conclusion._

(The wind howls outside. A faraway storm is getting closer.)

 **How long I am going to be waiting here? Waiting for what?**

 _I know how to carry this to a sooner end. I could reach a state of meditation deeper than a healing trance, and let my physiological functions to diminish until they stop. Faster than go outside and freezing._

 **I was never afraid of dying.**

 _The dissolution of my katra would be a welcomed relief._

 **But I can't make the decision. On top of everything, am I now a coward?**

 _I still have not given up hope. Faith is illogical, as today's events proved. I only need some more time to realize that clinging to hope is illogical as well._

 **Hope is all what I have left. Logic be damned. There must be a way to stop him. I have to find the way to stop him.**

 _Even if I have to break every and each law, directive and regulation? Even if I end up turning the past into a totally unrecognizable alternate timeline?_

 **Yes, because the cause is absolute. I'll try to cause the less damage possible, but I will not allow a mass murderer to succeed as long as I can fight.**

 _But I have no means to fight. I am just an old man, alone in an ice cave. What is, is, and I have to accept it._

 **How long have I been here? Is there any time left for…?**

 _ **What is that noise?**_

 _Breaking ice. Screeching and grunts. It might be a large lifeform. Possibly an aggressive one._

 **I should go to see what it is.**

 _What would be accomplished?_

 **I don't know. Knowing what's going on. That's the accomplishment.**

 _At the risk of exposing myself to mortal danger? Certainly, that would thwart any hope of stopping Nero._

 **So what? It is evident I can't do anything about him. Who cares about what happens to me? I don't care.**

 _Indeed, in this juncture, any effort of self-preservation serves no purpose._

(The old man rises up, takes the torch and goes to see. A horrific beast has got in the cave. It is in pursuit of something. It has caught something… a humanoid. A male, apparently, who is struggling uselessly. He has no chance to survive.)

(The old man closes his eyes. There is nothing he can do, nothing. He has seen so much destruction in this day, so much death, so many voices from two worlds are still screaming in agony in his mind, no more, no more. He wishes he could stop his heart right there, right now.)

(The humanoid screams make him shudder. He can't just keep standing there doing nothing.)

 **I could interpose myself in front of the predator, for it to eat me instead of him.**

 _It shall kill me immediately and then will devour him. It is in its nature._

(He opens his eyes and looks at the beast. He _**knows**_ what it is.)

 _ **A hengrauggi. Notoriously afraid of fire!**_

(That voice yelling from inside his mind, that lucid entity sitting above his warrying halves, shakes him up like an electric shock and blocks those useless thoughts of despair and death that had been spinning in his head for incalculable time.)

 _ **Spock! You CAN do something!**_

(He jumps into action as when he was a young officer in the Enterprise, wields the torch and throws himself into danger not thinking anymore about himself, but that saving a life that day, even if it is just one, is saving a whole universe.)


End file.
